I Don’t Want To. You Can’t Make Me.

I shit you not when I say this. There are TWELVE posts in my Drafts folder. I haven’t got a clue if I’m ever going to finish them. I typically have a 48 hour window between when I go out and when I want to get something down on “paper.” If it doesn’t essentially happen immediately, the post is screwed. All the jokes I think are oh so clever just seep out of my brain. The little insights I had while shoving something typically delicious in my mouth are lost and then posts turn into this generalized mess unbecoming of the Chef’s culinary genius. So why am I writing this instead of finishing any number of posts? This isn’t my day job and no one is going to tell me what to do. I just felt like writing a bunch of random stuff and posting pics (oddly enough taken from those very same half completed posts). Man those other posts got the shaft eh?


I just noticed the girl behind me. I was recently asked how often I have Sunglasses on my head like this. I went looking through some old photos and it’s A LOT! I lose Sunglasses like… every week? It’s disgusting. I stopped buying anything above Bi-Way level plastic trash because my glasses are the MVP of the Lost & Found Box. I took this photo because Popeyes grows some mutant chicken but now all I can see is the piece of skin stuck in my goatee. I’m willing to bet I walked around like that all day and Vanny submitted it to People Of Wal Mart.

Prayer In C (Robin Schulz Remix) by Lilly Wood And The Prick is really good. Just the remix though. The original version is kind of ass and was not worthy of my prestigious (awful) collection of music. I’ll listen to it on repeat for like an hour and then skip it for 6 months when it ends up shuffled on my phone. I guess that’s the destiny of all good music. You just beat it (LOL MUSIC PUNS) into the ground until you’re completely sick of it and then in a year you hear it on some Top 40 pop garbage z10000045.6 FM HITS while driving to the grocery store and remember how much joy it brought you.


Dave is legitimately one of the funniest guys I’ve ever met. He does creepy stuff like this and I split my tremendous gut. His Twitter is pretty tame so you’ll probably have to meet him at a food event or something. He’ll say things and if you don’t laugh you have no soul. Dave will read this because he’s like one of 3 people who actually subscribe via email. No pressure buddy.

IMG_0731LOL WTF I don’t even know where this was taken. I just found it on my phone and started laughing.


I could make an entire album of photos that Matt has ruined (aka made AWESOME). Thank God Chanry found that guy. WTF am I looking at? Probably something with cheese on it. UGH!

IMG_0813So Chanry’s kind of a genius. She comes to me a few months ago with this idea of a network for Hamilton bloggers. I’m all “we need a logo” and she’s all “SUCKA WE GOT ONE!” Well we have a logo so we HAVE TO make it happen. Damn am I glad we ran with this idea. We have met sooooooo many fantastic people in the last 3 months. This group makes me feel like I did in 2010 when I broke into Twitter and every person you meet is like opening the best gift you never knew you wanted on Christmas Day. We eat ourselves stupid, obsess about, and crack jokes on food that other people would be like “hooooooly shit get me out of here.” WHATEVER! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW! Don’t ever stop making new friends.

Want to get nostalgic? Let’s get nostalgic.


Jerome got married last week. Only Jason and I left in the single men’s club. This group of boys has been best friends for 20+ years now. In the case of Jason, Mark and I, it would be 25 years. We don’t see each other as much as we’d like. Wives, children, careers, tend to get in the way of “hey what’re you doing tonight? Oh nothing? Yeah let’s go out” hang outs. The fact we make the time to see each other whenever we can though always makes me legitimately warm and happy. Ever changing lives and in some cases long distances don’t change what we’ve got. I was talking with Sue Bee at the wedding and she remarked how crazy it is that we just pick up right where we left off every time we hang out. If you’ve got friends like that, don’t take them for granted. Cherish them. They, and you in turn, will enrich each other’s lives forever more.

Wow that was some Hallmark type shit.

I believe that top photo is Christmas 1996. Damn…






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